This year, for Christmas, I made a gift for David and Chloe. We take many, many pictures but rarely print them – the curse of the digital camera. So I decided to make a 2011 album as a gift from me to them.

It took many carefully planned hours of sneaking around to finish it. In those hours, with photos spread all over my kitchen … I got to relive 2011. More than once, tears welled up in my eyes as I remembered the many small moments of the past year. I saw beautiful moments between my daughter and husband and remembered the fancy dresses and wild tights Chloe insisted on wearing all last winter. I saw pictures of Chloe’s big haircut and her first day of school. There were pictures of us camping with friends and Chloe at swimming lessons. There were many smiles and silly faces. 2011 was a good year.

I get lost in the moment, in the “what’s next” and planning for things ahead. It’s not bad to do those things – but those things are uncertain, they are guesses. Thinking ahead can cause stress or worry because of the unknown and always living in that mindset is dangerous – keeping your mind on what could be.

Taking a moment to reflect on the past year is good for my soul. Looking back, I can see how blessed I am. There were things I feared that never happened and there were wonderful surprises that I never expected. There were milestones and victories where we celebrated and tearful moments that strengthened my faith. When I look back, all I can feel is grateful and gratitude leads to contentment – a perfectly wonderful way to begin a new year.

Happy New Year, friends! I’m feeling blessed by this past year and looking forward in anticipation to the next. Have you taken time to reflect on 2011?

Why I do what I do ~ Chloe heard dogs howling in the distance and told me they were saying all their vowels.

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I can think of so many things I’d rather be doing than cleaning my house in the summertime. Oh the menu planning and cooking? I really just can’t be bothered. I’d so much rather toss something on the grill every night and call it a meal.

Don’t worry, I’m not having a crisis over here – this isn’t my usual state of mind but when it’s beautiful outside I just want to go places and do things and be out in my garden. I don’t think that’s a terrible thing. I’m indoors PLENTY all winter long.

Having said all of that, it can be tough to be frugal in the summer when you’re feeling so carefree. Not planning meals and grocery trips can be a big mistake for me. Is it like that for you too?

To keep costs down during the busy summer I …

Have very simple meals

Nothing fancy is going on around here. Grilled chicken with a veggie and some noodles is gourmet summer at our house.

Keep quick things in the house

I had some frozen ravioli that I pulled out a couple nights ago. Throw on some sauce and I’m a happy girl.

Avoid being out and about during meal times

And if I know I’m going to be, then I try to pack a lunch. Eating out can consume so much of my food budget if I’m not careful. I’d rather eat out on purpose for a date night or something.

I’m enjoying my summer and my gardening and just being out in general. We’ve had a nearly perfect summer weather-wise in the Northeast (with the exception of this crazy heat wave!). I’ve been in and out of town a lot for camp and a wedding. I update Facebook with what I’m doing pretty frequently – especially now that I figured out how to upload photos from my phone If you’re not into Facebook, that’s cool, but if you are then come check out the d¢ Facebook page! I love to chat on there!

Why I do what I do ~ I could post very frequently about Chloe’s hilarious bedtime prayers. Tonight it went like this: “Dear Lord, please help us have a great day tomorrow and keep all the foxes away and just keep them in the forest forever. Amen.” We haven’t had a single conversation about foxes in recent memory … where does she get this stuff?

photo credit: GIANTsqurl

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In the world of frugal living, if you subscribe to five blogs then you’ve probably already heard every tip, trick and idea there is. You’ve learned how to make meals out of what you have in your cupboards. You’ve learned how to spend less at the grocery store and how to be a mindful consumer. And yet – you still read (not just you – me too).

It’s a curious thing, this blogging stuff. I haven’t posted a new post in 2 weeks. I have some drafts sitting there, waiting to be finished but I feel like they aren’t really anything deep or all that substantial – certainly nothing ingenious – just my ideas. After 2-1/2 years of posting, I feel like I’ve poured most of my good ideas out for you already.

Sitting here – staring at the admin side of my site, I started thinking. Why do people read my blog? I gave it some thought and here’s what occurred to me. For the vast majority of my readership I would guess that you read for two reasons.

First – you read for encouragement. Maybe you live a frugal lifestyle like I do and it’s encouraging to see someone else doing it and making it.

Second – you read because you’ve gotten to know me through my blog. I’ve had the wonderful pleasure of getting to know some of readers a little, either through their comments or their own blogs. I feel privileged that Domestic Cents has created such a kind, encouraging and friendly reader base.

So here’s where I’m headed – when I have a new idea I’m trying at home I’ll post about it. If I don’t, then I’ll post about the everyday stuff I’m doing anyway. I hope it will be encouraging to you and I know it will be helpful to me. I so appreciate those of you that open up and share a little bit of your life with me.

Here’s to fresh ideas and an encouraging, fun and friendly community … In the interest of updating, here’s our most recent family photo

Why I do what I do ~ No worries, I won’t stop posting this feature …
Chloe: “What is Tuna?” Me: “Tuna is a fish.” Chloe: “A KILLED fish???!”

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Chloe taking pictures. She says, "Smile Mama." She's easy to smile at ...

Last week I went to the library story hour with Chloe. When I pulled in, I immediately felt like I shouldn’t be there. The parking lot was full of brand-new Volvos, BMWs and Mercedes. By far, I was driving the worst car in the parking lot. I walked in, wearing my blue jeans and sneakers, carrying my no-name purse, and saw several people glance at me then back away. My hair was done, I was wearing makeup and I even managed to wear something besides a sweatshirt, but in comparison, I may as well have worn my pj’s. Chloe didn’t notice a thing, and happily sat down next to me.

Story hour was fine and Chloe had a good time, but no one talked to us. I left there feeling sad. We chose this town for the good school district but I didn’t think for a moment of the social implications. For a moment I felt  … discontented. It took me the afternoon to sort out my feelings. How is it possible that something could steal my contentment?

Feeling like I’m in high school again, I catch myself. I don’t want my daughter to be like that. I want her to be confident with who she is and I did a poor job of demonstrating that. They didn’t talk to me … but I didn’t talk to them either. I made myself feel inferior and drew conclusions the moment I pulled in the parking lot. I felt like they were snobs, but maybe they thought the same of me.

I want the peace I feel at home to go with me. Things and brand names don’t define me, for better or worse and only I can allow myself to feel less-than. I should be kind and friendly with a wealthy person as much as a poor person. I’m thinking about these things … about character and being genuine, things I want to instill in my daughter. I want people to like me for who I am, not who I appear to be and the only way they’ll have a chance to do that is if I am confident in just who I am.

I’m not sure how to conclude this, only to say that I still occasionally grapple with what things are important …  all the while knowing – things isn’t one of them.

You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are – no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought. Matthew 5:5 (The Message)

Why I do what I do ~ The other day I muttered to myself, “What is this world turning into?” Chloe felt the need to solemnly respond, “Earth.”

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I always get reflective as one year turns over to the next. I begin thinking about what the year holds for us. This year is a big deal – Chloe will begin Kindergarten in the Fall – WOW! Last year’s big thing was moving …

Thinking back about last year, looking ahead to this year – I think about what I like and where I’d like to see some change. I was listening to the radio the other day and they were talking about weight-loss. I wasn’t really listening until they started talking about cravings. They were talking about unhealthy and healthy cravings. I began to ponder the idea … what do I crave? When I feel frustrated or discontent, what is it that I’m craving?

Back in August, I was having a lot of headaches in the afternoon. It was no mystery what they were from – one cup of coffee and I’d feel just fine. I began to hate that my body was having that craving. I needed caffeine to feel good. I didn’t like that. I decided to cut all caffeine and coffee out of my diet, cold turkey. A few miserable days later and I was caffeine-free. I felt SO good to not have that craving. It was easier to wake up in the morning and I didn’t feel like I had dips in energy like before. In December I allowed myself to begin drinking decaffeinated coffee – because I really missed the taste, but I do NOT miss the addiction.

My body was having an unhealthy craving and I wanted badly to be free from it. Not all cravings are bad though. Do you crave more time with your spouse or children? Financial freedom? Do you have a spiritual craving? Do you crave health?

Thinking about some of the good cravings in my life, I narrowed in on a few. I crave more alone time with God, I crave better fitness in my body, I crave excellent relationships with my husband and daughter. There are others, but those top the list for me. Ridding myself of the unhealthy cravings in my life frees me up to focus on the healthy ones. I’m not saying that caffeine, in itself, has any connection with the other things – but I do believe that it occupied thoughts and energy that could have been spent in a more positive way.

Let me turn the focus for a moment to frugal living. Is there an unhealthy craving that keeps you from making frugal choices? Perhaps it’s a craving to shop or a craving for the latest gadgets. If you want to live a more frugal lifestyle but it’s been a struggle and an uphill battle for you, then take a moment to examine where you’re spending your money. Do you have a craving that’s holding you back? These are tough things to think about and I hope you all know I intend no condemnation but there is a very real connection between financial success and healthy spending. The healthy spending has come slow to me but the freedom … it is so worth it.

Other cravings I’ve battled in the past include unhealthy food, time on the internet and television. They may seem minor to you, but to me they were giants. We all have our giants, we all have our wishes for what could be. It’s a new year – a fresh start. I love those, don’t you? It’s the perfect time to give yourself a re-start. Rid yourself of something unhealthy and free yourself to focus more energy, time, or money on something you value.

Why I do what I do ~ I finished typing this post in the middle of the night, to be exact, the time is 4:12 a.m. I am not a crazy early riser, I just couldn’t sleep. I laid in bed for about an hour and a half before I decided I may as well get up and do something. I came out to my quiet living room, curled up on the couch with a blanket and tapped away at my keyboard. Everything is different at night. Ordinarily, I like my house picked up and everything in its place but tonight I’m looking at my “lived in” living room and I’m feeling grateful. There’s a water glass and a toy phone on the coffee table, cuddle blankets strewn on the couch, a book left open on the armrest and some folded laundry that never made it to the bedrooms. All I can think is how fortunate I am to have a”living” room and a family to share it with …
photo credit: igorschwarzmann

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Thankfulness is good for the soul.

For this past week, leading up to Thanksgiving, my family and I have been talking about what we’re thankful for and thanking God for the blessings in our life. When you focus on something so positive for days in a row it does something to you. It makes you grateful and appreciative. It makes me feel blessed beyond measure.

It’s not as difficult to go without some extras when you realize how much you already have. In our little family of three we are blessed with health, love, closeness, a home, warmth, nice clothes, healthy meals, and the list goes on. My husband and I are blessed to each have both parents still with us, and even some grandparents. We’re part of a rich heritage of families that are strong and stay together.

Keeping your focus on what you have, what makes you happy and remembering how fortunate you really are can go very far in making you content. And once you’re content, the desire for more things or better things easily slips to the back of your mind.

A very Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American friends )

Why I do what I do ~For about a week now we’ve been focusing on being thankful during our family prayer at night. My daughter thanks God for things like: “… darkness to help me sleep and the sun to wake me up in the morning.” I get some serious perspective from that child.

Photo credit: Lane & Anne

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There’s something I’ve been noticing lately that’s been bothering me a little. I’m not ordinarily the kind of person to go on and on yelling about something that bugs me, but this one pertains to what I write about on here so I thought I’d throw it out there and see what I get (Please don’t throw things at me).

Here’s my question. When you go somewhere that has a price based on age, do you lie about your child’s age to get them a lower price or would you if you could? For instance, if children 3 and under are free do you tell the person at the window that your 4-year-old is 3?

The reason I’ve started noticing it is because my daughter is just coming to that age where it’s starting to cost money for her to do things. For 3 years we enjoyed the free-dom of having a small child. They go everywhere free. But since she turned 4 we’ve had to pay for her to go almost everywhere – the aquarium, fairs, beaches, parks etc.

You would not believe the number of people that have said things to me like, “Oh just tell them she’s 3. They won’t even second-guess you.” And it’s true. I could say she’s 3 and they really couldn’t fight me on it. Most people don’t carry around a birth certificate.

Here’s how I view it. It’s harsh, I know. I think that lying about your child’s age to save a few dollars is like putting a price on your integrity. You’re willing to be dishonest to save yourself $8. I think it sets a poor example for the child you’re lying about, that you only have to be honest sometimes.

OK, I’ve said it. I feel a little better now. Does anyone agree with me? Do you politely disagree?

Why I do what I do ~ I think if I lied about Chloe’s age she’d be mad at me. She’d probably yell out, “I’m not 3!!! I’m 4!!!” Boy, that would be embarrassing.

Admission photo credit: Orin Zebest

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The World I want for my daughter …

is healthy. Pollution and food-born illness are scarce. I wouldn’t have to worry about the food I purchase.

is affordable. Families can live a good life on one income, if they want to. Nice housing wouldn’t be reserved for the well-off and over-worked.

is safe. Parents could feel safe allowing their children to walk to school or a friend’s house. Mothers wouldn’t lay awake at night, worrying about their college-age daughters on campus.

is at peace. Our soldiers could be bored … on our own soil.

I live in a town where people don’t lock their car doors. I lock my home at night, but many people don’t. Families walk, pushing their baby carriages, kids riding their bikes, down our streets. Our playgrounds are clean and safe. In the winter, I can leave my car running in the parking lot while I run into a store. The most mischief there is in our town are kids pouring dish soap in the water fountain.

As much as I wish our world was different, I feel abundantly blessed to be living where I do. It isn’t perfect. I would change many things. But when I think of how much worse it could be, I stop and my thoughts shift toward wishing people in other areas had the safety and freedom that I have right now.

In many, many areas of my very own country crime is a normal part of life and tragedies like rape, assault and abuse are common. I feel so incredibly fortunate that things like that are a little more scarce here and I daily thank God that my family is safe and healthy.

I’ve written this post today to join in with Country-Fried Mama in raising awareness for Joyful Heart Foundation. The mission of the foundation is “to heal, educate and empower survivors of sexual assault, domestic violence and child abuse and shed light into the darkness that surrounds these issues.” The world I want for my daughter wouldn’t need a foundation like this. But we need it. If you or someone you love is a survivor of one of these crimes, you’re not alone. Please take a minute a see how Joyful Heart can help.

Why I do what I do ~ I’m one of those sensitive people. I’m one of those people whose heart strings are tugged a little too easily. Have you ever held a baby that’s been physically abused? I have. And I wanted to take her home with me. Things like this are real and they are all around us. I can make this world better by raising a daughter with a positive world view, with love and compassion for others … and maybe heartstrings that are tugged just like her mother’s.

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I love the month of May. It could be because it’s the month that I became a mother (Chloe’s birthday – she turned 4!!), or because Mothers Day is in there or perhaps because it’s also my birthday month. It might have a little to do with the warm spring air or opening my windows and smelling cut grass. It’s cold for sooooo long where I live that I heartily embrace the renewal of spring.

I’ve been busy cleaning, airing out, line-drying, planting, swing-pushing and grilling … and I have been loving it. I know my posting has been pretty sporadic – but I’m guessing you don’t mind a little less clutter in your reader or your inbox. My life tends to move with ebbs and flows and I try my best to just go with it (which takes some serious effort for this structured girl). I was out of town a LOT this month and it felt a little better to chat with family in my pj’s than to open my laptop and work on my blog. I have great readers. I know many of you are nodding your heads in agreement.

This blog is (mostly) about living frugally, but don’t you find that a frugal life – is also a simple life? I don’t mean simple as in “plain” or “ordinary.” I mean simple like – uncluttered, un-rushed, slower, less chaotic, more creative, etc. As I’ve become more and more comfortable with a “less is more” lifestyle I’ve started thinking – this is nice, this is really nice.

As a family, we’re learning to find happiness, joy, fun and contentment in simple things. This blog is about things I do well, but also about things I’m learning. One of those things is that so many, many things aren’t important to me. If I think about the things that bring fulfillment and add positively to my life, they are mainly people, relationships, quality time together, eating good food, enjoying the outdoors and trying to master some domestic skills.

I’ve learned that I get a lot of fulfillment out of making or creating things myself rather than purchasing them – and I like that. I have somehow come to love walking outside far more than through a mall. I seriously have no idea when that happened but I’m glad it did. I’ve learned that the reason I like going on a date with David is because I like being with him – and the amount of money we spend on that date affects the time very little.

Because we’re disciplined and starting to be smart with our money while we’re relatively young, I know that one day I won’t have to be frugal and I won’t have to make as many sacrifices – but I hope I don’t forget or lose sight of the things that have changed me and made me into the girl that I am now. I hope that even when I don’t have to, I’ll still hold onto the value of less in my life.

Why I do what I do ~ Do you remember the bunny I sewed for Chloe for Easter? Well, we celebrated Easter away from home and I forgot to bring it with us so I gave it to her when we got home and told her it was an “I love you” present from me to her. That was over a month ago. Even now, she takes that bunny with her many of the places that we go and sleeps with it at night. People usually ask about it (because it’s weird-looking I think) and she very proudly tells them it’s her “I love you bunny.” Every. single. time. I choke up. My daughter understands love so much more than I do sometimes.

photo credit: garryknight

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Why I do what I  do ~

Because she calls me “Mama”
and she still squeezes me tight
Because she always wants a cuddle
after turning out the lights

Because she’s so creative
and more artistic than I’ll ever be
Because when she’s scared or tired
she always calls for me

Because her eyes are brown and green
they are the same as mine
And every time she smiles
her eyes get bright and shine

Because she loves to brush my hair
while she is story-telling
Because she makes me crack a smile
when I want to be yelling

Because she loves dinosaurs
and princesses the same
Because she loves the color red
and loves to spell her name

Because I wasn’t sure I’d have her
the girl I hold so dear
When I became a Mama
I had many happy tears

Because she could talk an hour
and never take a breath
She’s just like her Mama
my Chloe Alizabeth.

This Mothers Day, I want to celebrate my family. My heart is full of love for the husband that made me a mother and for the daughter I am so blessed to have.

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