Happy Anniversary David

Today is my sixth wedding anniversary. Some of you are thinking … ha, she’s still a newlywed, while others may just be hoping to be married some day.

Many people view marriage as a long-term relationship, but keep in the back of their mind that there’s a way out if they need it. Not us. No, really, not us. Divorce has never, ever entered a single discussion and neither has separation, because we have the perfect marriage right? No. Because we haven’t been married long enough to have a real trial, right? No. It’s because we are committed. We still have lots to learn, but we’re learning it together.

Here’s some things that six years of marriage have taught me so far:

Being in love and choosing to love someone are two different things. Although they can be connected, they aren’t always. My dad has a great definition for love, “using your God-given ability of choice to do that which is in the best interest of another person.” Sometimes when you choose to love someone, it isn’t very fun. David loves me by taking care of the trash and dealing with mouse traps when they’re needed (I shudder just typing that). I bet he’s not overwhelmed with tingly emotions when completing those tasks, but he’s loving me in a way I really need.

Feeling in love is important too. Sometimes, when you’ve lived with someone for a while and you get in a routine things can get a little too routine. Sometimes I still want to feel like David’s girlfriend and have fun together. If we don’t make the time to have fun and enjoy each other’s company we get edgy. Throw a little fun in the equation and he’s got me giggling and I’m excited for what’s up next.

Fair fighting makes everyone win. There’s nothing wrong with fighting if you play by the rules: No accusing, pointing fingers and mean-spirited talk. No interrupting. We each get our turn to say what we need. We don’t go to bed mad and we have to make up afterwards. The last one has made for some late nights, but always ensures better mornings. One other thing, no fighting in front of our daughter.  That’s tough, but we really try not to.

There will always be rough patches. There will always be heavenly bliss … at one point or another. A lot of times it’s somewhere in the middle. Either way, sticking through the rough times makes the heavenly ones even better. No matter what, we’re on the same team. I’m with him and I’ve got his back, and he’s got mine.

A good marriage isn’t 50%/50%, it’s 100%/100%. If I give 100% of myself to fulfilling his needs and he gives 100% of himself to fulfilling my needs then our needs are met in the selfless way they were meant to be (ideally, of course).

Who you’ve got is infinitely more important than what you’ve got. We’ve lived in some rough places, driven some ugly cars and not always had the nicest things, but we have an awesome marriage … and now an awesome family.

A marriage is worth investing in. If there’s one place you don’t want to skimp it’s on your marriage. We do whatever we can to have dates and spend one-on-one time together. We have to be creative, but it’s always 100% worth it. Investing in our relationship ensures that it’s going to be around for a while, or for as long as be both shall live.

David, I am so happy to be your wife. I have loved being married and continuing this fantastic relationship we’re so fortunate to have. The more I’ve gotten to know you the more I find that you were truly meant for me. Thanks for being my other half, my partner in crime, my favorite laugh, the warmer of our bed, my clear thinker, the love of my life and my truest, closest friend.

Always,
Nicki

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Tagged as: Family Life, Marriage